The Holy Spirit used that sermon to break my heart...that is, to break my heart for what breaks God's heart. Sin...sin that separates me from Him.
I was convicted...not condemned...but convicted. That's important...conviction draws you to God...condemnation pulls you away.
All of this happened as I drove to work on Wednesday morning. By the time I reached my workplace, I was a mess. Mascara and tears stained my cheeks, my eyes were red and puffy from crying...my gracious....it was totally unexpected.
Yet I knew what I had to do.
At that very moment......not one minute later....couldn't wait until my next church service....couldn't wait to have a conversation with a pastor, leader or prayer partner...no, in the parking lot of my workplace, I wept...I confessed my sin...SIN...SIN....(we don't like to call it SIN, we like to call it "issues", "mistakes", "not trusting") and repented. And then, I did something to ensure that I would break this cycle of sin in my life...I followed scripture:
Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. (James 5:16)So, immediately I sent a text to my best friend, confessing it ALL....below is an excerpt from that text:
Forever I've never faced that...... is a sin. I called it "not trusting"...until this morning. So first I confessed and asked His forgiveness. I must get this sin out of my life."The text went on to ask for not only prayer, but for accountability...I asked that she specifically ask me about this sin....call me out...
Proverbs 28:13 says: People who conceal their sins will not prosper, but if they confess and turn from them, they will receive mercy.
As I reflected on the last two days, I realized something big...really big...God has given me amazing best friends to walk through this life. I can be victorious because Jesus is victorious...but having TWO best friends makes my life much more full.
You see Anisa and Gwen, are more than a best friend. We do a lot more than have fun and use lots of sarcasm with one another....let me just list a few things they are to me:
My accountability chicks
My prayer warriors
My encouragers
Two of my biggest fans
Know more about me than just about anyone
They love me anyway
They know the darkest hours of my life
They know my brightest days
They laugh with me
They cry with me
They hold my arms up in the midst of the battle when I'm weary
They are my Aaron and Hur. (Exodus 17:12-13)
BUT...isn't there always a BUT?
There is this one thing Anisa and Gwen do not do...have never done...not once that I can remember...they do not judge me.
Never have either of them said to me "Really Debbie?!?!!? Get over it!"
They just love me.
Several years ago a pastor of mine from another church asked me if I had a best friend...I did not...he said, "Sister Debbie, I'm praying that God will provide that for you."
Within a couple of years God knit this friendship together with Anisa and Gwen. I cannot imagine my life without them...
A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken. (Ecclesiastes 4:12)I've been attacked...but not defeated...this triple-braided cord is not easily broken!
Do you have that friend? If not, I'm praying today that God knits you together with a best friend that is more than you can ask or imagine.
