Bitterness

Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many. (Hebrews 12:15)

So often I think I've overcome something. You know, a situation, a relationship or even a habit. And so often, I tend to walk in pride when I THINK I've overcome.

I was reminded yesterday that I have NOT overcome. I realized, almost accidently, that I had allowed a root of bitterness to take hold in my heart. It was disguised by an "I don't care" attitude...the Holy Spirit gently reminded me that I did care and that I was allowing anger and bitterness to fill me.  I was not dealing with this in a biblical, healthy way.

So what's a girl to do? Well let me tell you what I did!  I looked for someone to agree with me that I was right.  To affirm to me that anyone would be angry in this same situation, that it was unthinkable how I was treated.  I wanted to whine.  I didn't want to just fly through barn a couple of times, I wanted to build a nest and sit for a while and go over every detail of how wrong it was. 

But God!  You see, I already knew what Jesus wanted me to do, but like Jonah in Jonah 1:3 "But Jonah got up and went in the opposite direction to get away from the Lord." I too went in the opposite direction. I wanted someone to join me in my pity party. alas, no one did. Thank God for wise friends!
So, I did the thing I knew I was supposed to do. Go to God, His Word and His truths. 

He spoke so clearly to me. He reminded me of who I am in Him. He reminded me that His plan for my life may have some difficult situations, rocky relationships and take me to places that are very uncomfortable...but it is all for my good. All of it. And all He wants me to do is Trust Him....bring these weaknesses, these hurts, habits and hangups to Him, so He can heal them and teach me to be more like Him, to respond more like Him.  To be a bright spot even in my own darkness.


So today, I start fresh. I start anew....thanking Him for my weakness. Because it is in my weakness that He is made strong. (2 Corinthians 12:9). Too often I lean on my own understanding when all I really need to do is lean on Him.
Looking forward to walking into a new day with a new attitude and a smile!  Thankful His mercies are new everyday!!!